How Mediation Works: A Step-by-Step Guide

Your journey begins with a free, confidential phone or video consultation with Alisa Kharis, our lead mediator. This is your opportunity to:

• Describe your situation — Tell us what brought you here and what you hope to accomplish.
• Ask questions — Learn about mediation, how it compares to litigation, and whether it is a good fit for your circumstances.
• Understand the process — We will walk you through what to expect, estimated timelines, and approximate costs.
• Feel heard — We listen carefully and without judgment. There is absolutely no pressure or obligation.

By the end of this conversation, you will have a clear picture of whether mediation is right for you and what your next steps would be.

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Once you decide to move forward, we begin the preparation phase. This is a critical step that sets the foundation for productive sessions.

What we will ask you to provide:

• Relevant financial documents (tax returns, bank statements, pay stubs)
• Property records and asset inventories
• Existing legal agreements or contracts
• A list of the issues you want to address
• Your priorities and goals for the outcome

What we do during this phase:

• Review all submitted documents and information
• Identify the key issues to be resolved
• Develop a customized mediation plan tailored to your case
• Prepare an agenda for your first joint session

We understand that gathering documents can feel overwhelming, especially during an emotional time. We provide a clear checklist and are available to answer questions along the way.

This is where the real work begins. Joint sessions are conducted via secure video conferencing with both parties and the mediator present.

Here is what happens during a joint session:

• Opening statements — Each party has the opportunity to share their perspective without interruption.
• Agenda review — The mediator outlines the issues to be discussed and confirms priorities.
• Guided discussion — The mediator facilitates a structured conversation, ensuring both sides are heard equally.
• Identifying common ground — We highlight areas of agreement to build momentum and trust.

The mediator maintains a respectful, balanced environment throughout. If emotions run high, we take breaks. If parties need to speak privately with the mediator, we use a technique called “caucus” — a confidential, one-on-one conversation conducted via virtual breakout rooms, so each party can speak with the mediator privately without leaving the session.

With the issues clearly defined, we move into the negotiation phase. This is the heart of mediation — where creative solutions emerge.

What this looks like in practice:

• Exploring options — The mediator helps brainstorm potential solutions you may not have considered.
• Reality testing — We help you evaluate each option practically: What would this look like in your daily life? Is this financially sustainable?
• Interest-based negotiation — Rather than focusing on rigid positions (“I want the house”), we explore underlying interests (“I need stability for the children”) to find solutions that satisfy both parties.
• Managing impasses — If you get stuck on an issue, the mediator may suggest a temporary solution, break the issue into smaller parts, or revisit it after other agreements build trust.

Most clients are surprised by how many creative, fair solutions exist once both sides feel safe enough to explore them.

Once you have reached agreement on all issues, we put it in writing. The mediator prepares a comprehensive Memorandum of Understanding (MOU) or Mediation Agreement that documents every term you have agreed upon.

The agreement includes:

• All resolved issues, clearly stated in plain language
• Specific terms, timelines, and responsibilities for each party
• Any contingencies or conditions

What happens next:

• Both parties receive a draft to review carefully
• We strongly recommend each party have the agreement reviewed by an independent attorney
• Revisions are made as needed until both parties are satisfied
• Both parties sign the final agreement

The final step depends on the nature of your mediation:

• Divorce mediation: The signed agreement is submitted to the court along with your divorce petition. In most cases, the court accepts mediated agreements without modification, and your divorce is finalized.
• Family mediation: The agreement becomes a binding contract between the parties, or it may be submitted to the court for a formal order (such as a modified parenting plan).
• Business mediation: The agreement functions as a legally binding contract once signed by all parties.
• Estate mediation: The agreement guides the distribution of assets and resolution of disputes, and may be incorporated into court proceedings if applicable.

Once finalized, you have a clear, written plan — and the peace of mind that comes with knowing you created it together.